I have thought long and hard about this post and whether or not I would share it. But, today holds such significance in my life. On September 29, 2007, I was shooting at a wedding while my mother was dying.
My mother, Sylvia, is the reason why I chose to go into professional photography full-time. Her sudden departure helped me realize how your world can change in a fraction of time. The last thing I ever imagined was to experience the loss of my mother at such a young age. My mother suffered a sudden, unexpected, massive heart attack. She was only 67 and I was only 34, the landscape of my life had just changed, dramatically.
At the time of her death, I was working full-time with adults with traumatic brain injury, going to grad school full-time for a master’s degree in mental health counseling and shooting weddings on the weekends. Her death helped me realize that your life can change without any notice and that I should fulfill my dreams and pursue photography full-time.
So with my Mom in my heart, I took the plunge into a small business. I have no regrets, I love being a photographer. I feel so fortunate to have a job that I love with such wonderful clients. My mother used to call me the night before every wedding I photographed to wish me good luck and tell me how much she loved me. She was so very proud.
My mother was the person that lit up a room when she walked in, the whole energy of the room changed. Someone could be having the worst day and my mother would find a way to make them smile, either through the genuineness of who she was, or her infectious laugh.
You are not given a choice when someone you love dies and that really sucks. My Mom never had the opportunity to meet my amazing, husband Pete. I have learned to not take anything for granted, even the smallest things.
Today, I ask something of you; let your Mother know how much you love her.
This next part is a tribute to my mom…. I love you…
Mom
You are an incredibly, amazing woman that is my mother: magnetic, nurturing, hilarious, beautiful, vibrant, compassionate, charismatic, and most of all loving
You are the mother that loves her children with such fierce passion
You are the Mom who let Brad egg crate the garage and turn it into his sound stage, because he thought he was a rock star
You are the Mom that thought it was great when Andy webbed the entire staircase with all of your yarn, because he is Spider Man
You are the Mom that put your daughters through countless beauty pageants
Stephanie could not have been more mortified when she was crowned Miss Fulton County Teenager, but you were elated. You made it up to her though, by being such a wonderful Nonie to her two beautiful boys
I, on the other hand, loved all the beauty pageants and wore my Little Miss Sunshine crown with honor. You always let me know how much I was loved.
You are the mother who let me read my long, boring, college papers to your over the phone, I can’t tell you how much that meant to me
You are the mom that made green cakes on St. Patrick’s Day and signed the presents from Santa in your own handwriting
You are the Mom that left us snickers bars under our pillow when one of us lost a tooth, but scolded us if we forgot to brush our teeth
You are the Mom who brushed our hair and tickled out backs while we watched Love Boat and Fantasy Island, our Saturday night ritual
You are the Mom who took us to the beach everyday in the summer. I can close my eyes and still smell the sweet goodness of your Bain de Soleil orange suntan gel
You are the mother that we were so fortunate to have.
I will not think of you in death, but in the life you breathed into each one of you children, I know you are so proud
You gave us all such an incredible gift. You gave us the courage and ability to be fearless and embrace our individuality.
You allowed us figure out who we are without restrictions, with an open heart, an open mind
The memories of you are endless and you will always be with us, that’s your beauty.
Dad has always said that Brian is the angel that sits on his shoulder. He talks to him every day.
You are my angel…
There is a brightness that burns inside me, thank you Mom, for all your love……
October 01, 2009 Important. Impactful. Heartfelt. Beautiful.
September 30, 2009 Tracey,
That was beautiful and moving. Your mom would be so proud. And you are so inspiring for changing your life to do what you love, because life is too short…..
Joann
September 29, 2009 I just wrote a letter to my Mom. Thanks for sharing and for reminding me to cherish every new and old memory.
Miss you!
September 29, 2009 Thank you for sharing such a personal post. How true that our lives change dramatically without our mothers, our shepards, our stewards in life. Take comfort in the fact that like your mother, the women in your life are with you to support you in every way. We are smiling into your lens everytime we face you.
September 29, 2009 Simply put, beautiful.
In the short time I have known you, I feel so blessed to bear witness to your mother's light shining brighter and brighter inside you. It is obvious this reverence rewards you every time you look through the lens. When you get that perfect or unexpected shot (you know, the one you didn't even know was there), that's your phone call. It is a spectacularly beautiful thing! Shine on rock stars, super heroes and beauty queens… Shine on.
September 29, 2009 Wow, Tracey. Obviously I never met your mom, but I feel like I knew her by knowing you. Thank you for sharing your vulnerability and authenticity.
September 29, 2009 T-That was so beautiful..I'm thinking of you today & always. She would be so proud of you! xo B
September 29, 2009 I'm crying…and I'm going to call my mother..Aunt Sylvia..you were one in a million..and so is your daughter…
September 29, 2009 Dear Tracey,
That was beautiful. I am positive that she is incredibly proud of you (I know I am proud to be your friend). Take care and much love to you, Pete and your mom.
September 29, 2009 Such a lovely tribute to your mother, Tracey. Mothers hold such power with their children. It makes me smile knowing yours was one who left such a positive "mark" on hers. Awesome.
September 29, 2009 Tracey – You are an amazing person who has such an awesome outlook on life… you are an inspiration to those around you. It's obvious that your Mom had a lot to do with that……
September 29, 2009 so well said Trace…you know I love you. I miss her. Sometimes I wish she would just call… and to think how I took those calls for granted. I feel sad, but mom would want us to rock this day. I'm taking dad shopping – so maybe I can talk him into a few boxes of Lucky Charms :)
All my love to my adoring fans,
Miss Fulton County Teenager, 1983
September 29, 2009 That is a beatiful tribute, Tracey. Your mom would be proud! Sending happy and loving thoughts your way…
Shannon
September 29, 2009 Tracey,
Your mother is so honored by you. Thank you for sharing such an intimate and beautifully moving post.
With tears,
Jenny Whiteneck